- Articulate your dream. How can you achieve it if you don’t know what it is? Be very specific. If you hate your job and you want to change jobs, do some serious soul searching and figure out what your dream job would look like. Where would you be? What would your office look like? Who would you work with? What would you do? What would you wear to work? How often would you be working? What would you eat for lunch? Be as detailed as you possibly can. You’ll be surprised how much you’ll learn just by asking yourself these questions. Write down your answers, so you can reference them later.
- Answer this one question: “What would you do if you took fear out of the equation?” My husband once asked me that, and I tell you, it changed my life. It helped me bypass all the bullshit so I could whittle decisions down to their essence. What I realized was that I was not living my dream because I was desperately afraid- of financial ruin, of failure, of letting people down, of regret, even of success. Asking this question helped me separate the fear from the dream, and in doing so, I realized that I really wanted to move forward, in spite of the fear. The question helped me identify the fears and determine whether they deserved as much power as I was giving them. That way, I could address the fears separately. Do I still worry about those fears? You betcha. Sometimes I have those dark nights of the soul at 3am when I’m overcome with them. But do I let them rule my choices anymore? Nope.
- Timing is everything. If you don’t know what to do, it’s probably not time yet. When the time is right to act, you’ll know. Which leads us to #4…
- Listen to your intuition. You’d be surprised how brilliant your inner wisdom is. Your gut knows more than any other individual ever will.
- Believe that your dream will come true. Visualize it. Richard Bach said, “You are never given a wish without also being given the power to make it true.”
- When the time comes to go after your dream, send naysayers to time out. Chances are, you have all the criticism you can stand between your own two ears. Kindly inform well-meaning family members, friends, and co-workers that you’ve got plenty of self-critique happening already. What you need from them is faith in your ability to achieve your dreams- or silence. Which leads us to #7…
- Gag your inner critic. This is the time to be your own best cheerleader. You won’t be able to eliminate that fearful voice of criticism within, but you can muffle it so it doesn’t drown out the stadium anthem music you hear when you dream big.
- Make room in your life for your dream to come true. I’m serious. Be careful what you wish for- because if you approach it right, it WILL come true. Then what? Build your life to hold space for your dream. Then when it comes true, you’ll be prepared.
- Don’t be afraid to fly with eagles. You may have been living a sparrow kind of life, but if you’re dreaming big, you’re gonna be flying with eagles, baby! Let the eagles inspire you, but don’t let them make you feel small or unworthy. If I’d been afraid to fly with eagles, I wouldn’t have met Rachel. Dream big- FLY!
- Work hard and stay focused. Few people who are living their big dream got lucky. Most worked their ass off to achieve their dreams.
- Be gutsy and take risks. You may feel like you’ve jumped off a cliff and you’re free falling through outer space- and if you’re living your dream, chances are, you are. Embrace it! The free fall is exciting, and you never know where you’re going to land. Jumping off the proverbial cliff means that anything can happen. My all time favorite cartoon shows a stick woman floating in an upside down umbrella. The caption above her says, “If you hold onto the handle, it’s easier to maintain the illusion of control. But it’s more fun if you let the wind carry you.” –Brian Andreas
- Go with the flow. Once you’ve jumped off the cliff, ride whatever wave you land on. I call my flow the “lavender-scented river.” Quit fighting the current and just enjoy the ride. It’s how big dreams come true, when you finally quit fighting and let go.
- If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Yes, it’s trite. But SO true. I can’t tell you how many rejections I’ve suffered in my life- from medical schools to art galleries to literary agents to men to publishers…But it doesn’t keep me from putting myself out there. Grab the core of you, hold it close and keep it safe, but be willing to put the rest of you out there in the world. If someone rejects you, it’s not personal. Try again.
- Nurture yourself. Get a massage, take personal days all to yourself, have lunch with a girlfriend, take a hike in nature, meditate, go on a retreat away from the family…whatever it takes to fill you up so that you’re overflowing and have more to give to your passion. It’ll serve you well when those naysayers show up…
- Put yourself out there. Do you think Susan Boyle was ever going to be discovered when she was home singing in the shower? No! The woman had the guts to get herself on Britain’s Got Talent, and voila! Big dream come true. How much you wanna bet she’ll be singing for the queen? If you missed her unbelievable performance, click here to weep, laugh, and revel in big dreams come true. If Susan Boyle singing “I Dreamed a Dream” doesn’t rock your world, I give up…
You can do it Pinkies! What’s your big dream? What’s getting in the way of making it come true? Let’s talk….
Love and BIG BIG dreams,
Lissa
PS. Are you living your dream? Enter the Paint Your Life Pink contest and tell us how.
Tags: I Dreamed A Dream, inspiration, inspirational, Les Miserables, motivation, motivational, Susan Boyle, You Tube
It is a CONSTANT battle to listen to my heart and my gut over the ever-loud criticism of the world, not to mention the people I love. But I must persevere!
You go girl! Listen to your heart- I swear it knows better than all the critics-within and without. Yes, you must persevere. Otherwise, you’ll wind up unfulfilled, weakened, even sick. I see it all the time. Be true to you, girlfriend. The rest will follow…
One place I’ve realized I get stuck is not seeing that I’ve actually achieved something (perhaps it’s the freaked-out feeling of having jumped off the cliff and not embracing the excitement of hurtling through outer space!). Too often I get stuck on the challenges of a new situation. It might help to pause and bow in gratitude to the universe and ourselves for actually making our dreams happen. Thanks for these wonderful tips and reminders on how to make them happen in the first place.
Loved this post! And I love the blog too.
Great ideas here. Thanks for posting them.
I guess I’m in the process of the leap. I am plodding along as if this dream of mine is going to happen. Hard work, perseverance, faith in myself, and just doing it daily is paying off. The truth is I think it will happen. But if it doesn’t, I will have given it a good shot at success. Keep reminding me that dreams do come true, especially if they are to benefit others. I am a Dream Catcher right now! Come along!’
“A poor woman is not one without money, but one without a dream!” Are you rich? Trish
This is by far your best post ever. I am so happy you got the chance to meet Rachel.
I didn’t know you met your husband on Match, maybe it’s time for me to get back on it.
I laughed when I read your mention of JABA – made me think about Capt’n Crunch! *laughing*
Your post comes at the perfect time for me. I am filled mostly with confidence but suffer short bouts of doubt.
I think I’ll go beyond gagging my inner critic, I’m going to bitch slap her AND those relatives of mine who don’t support or understand what I am trying to do (ok, I won’t bitch slap them but I will ignore the negative joo-joo).
You Miss Lissa are a bright shining light in my life. Keep it real. Keep it (I can’t believe I’m going to say this….) PINK!
WOW–that’s awesome! I got to meet Anne Lamott–oh my god, I was so nervous I made the BIGGEST ass out of myself–and then wouldn’t you know I was seated DEAD in front of her at the lecture/workshop….BUT I was in the second row, and directly in front of ME was Billy Baldwin, the cute younger Baldwin brother (who is into spirituality but is not “saved” like the other right-winged one)–so I comforted myself by taking in the sights every time he had to lean over to get a drink of water, a booklet–the pencil I threw in front of him…because his jeans were low-slung…and well, I am shameless, OK??
Anyway, Anne Lamott was really funny and as cool as you’d think, even when she just had to sit there blinking at me as I babbled at her.
OMG, chicas! I’ve been seeing patients all day and away from the computer and I just returned to discover the unbelievable GIFT of your sweet comments. I’m SO glad this post touched you. I wrote it late last night after I finished bawling my eyes out. I don’t know why meeting with Rachel left me feeling so fragile and vulnerable- she was nothing but affirming and beautiful and gracious. But it touched some core in me that went deep. So I hiked and processed, and this is what burped up.
And Michele, I’m SOOOOO jealous (but in a so-happy-for-you good way, not a mean girl catty way). I LOVE Anne Lamott. In fact, when I first moved to Marin County, I ran around yelling, “Annie! Annie,” looking in vain for any white woman with dreads. Then one day, I saw her in her driving in her cute little VW bug with the bumper sticker that says, “Who would Jesus bomb?” And I got all giddy inside. Her top was down and her dreads were flying and she was on a quiet little street in Fairfax, right in front of me, going about 20 miles an hour for quite a while.
And that was enough. That was my Annie fix, and it was enough. Part of me wanted to honk or slam into her rear end so we’d have to stop and exchange contact information…but then, that’s psycho, and I love her…so I let the crazy thought go. So while I would still love to meet her (Annie, if you’re out there somewhere, let’s have lunch! I’ll even cook…), it made my year.
But you, you got to breathe her air and hang out with Billy, you rock star, you!
Again, thank you all for caring about my random blah blah (wiping more tears…it’s been a weepy week).
Dream big, Pinkies!
xoxo
Lissa
This is a wonderful wisdom-filled piece of writing that deserves its prominent place on the bathroom mirror. Kudos to you for living your dream! (So am I, by the way!)
What a wise list! Thank you. I love the question your husband asked! Fearlessness is my word for the year.
For me, it hasn’t been so much fearlessness- because I still have a lot of fear. It just doesn’t rule me anymore. I notice my fear- analyze it, determine whether it has any validity, and then make decisions in spite of it. If I’m afraid because I think I’m about to get attacked by a mountain lion, you better believe I’m gonna run like hell. In that case, my fear was valid. But if I’m perseverating over the fear that I won’t pay the bills this month or that my education will be wasted or that my father would be disappointed- or whatever- then my fear is holding me back. Those fears I just release to the universe- and move on.
Again today you’ve spoken to me, Lissa. I have wanted to quit my job and do freelance graphic design full time for over two years now. I want to sell my jewelry and homeschool my son. I do it part time as well as my full time job and it’s just about to do me in.
My husband can’t get by the fear of “What if?” I’m going to read this to him tonight.
Thanks so much for this post.
Oh good, Kim. I’m so glad this post spoke to you. There is NEVER an easy time to take a Pleap (my word for “pink leap of faith.”) I think it comes with the territory. If you’ve got all your ducks in a row with a giant safety net beneath you, it’s no longer a leap of faith and doesn’t carry the same weight. There’s something about setting your intention, believing in your mission, and JUMPING that takes you to another plane. And I can say from experience, that’s when the flow of the Universe starts working its magic.
Wheeeeeee!!!!!!
I completely understand, Kim. I quit my job 18 months ago to start my own business and stay home with my baby. My husband is STILL trying to cope with the worry of what if. But we’ve always been able to pay our bills, and I’ve been so much happier. Don’t give up on what you know in your heart is right.