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Mojo Mondays: Bless & OWN Your Body

Lissa Rankin's picture
Me, almost revealing my belly (but not quite- I gotta OWN it first)

Me, almost revealing my belly (but not quite- I gotta OWN it first)

 

Happy Mojo Monday, Pinkies! Today we’re going to work on mojo by Owning Our Bodies. Today was a gorgeous sunny day at the beach where I live, so it was the first day of BATHING SUIT SEASON. AHHH!!!! I’ve lost 20 lbs this year by green juicing, eating lots of raw foods, growing my own organic garden, doing yoga, hiking regularly- but no matter what I do, I still have this little gut that pooches out. And after giving birth 3 1/2 years ago, I decided- today- that I was going to wear a bikini for the first time since I was pregnant. Funny, when I was pregnant, I had no problem wearing a bikini. I was so happy in my skin with my pregnant belly. It’s as if I finally got permission not to stress out about my gut! But since then? Forget it. I’ve been cursing my belly and HATING it. And it’s not like it’s that big. If you saw it you’d kick me. My husband rolls his eyes when I complain. In fact, he says he can’t notice the difference with the 20 lb weight loss. (Yeah, sure…) Says he loves me either way and I’m no more sexy skinnier. (I think, “Liar!” But he swears it’s true.)

Which makes me wonder. Why are we women so hard on ourselves? Bet you have the same issue. Some nagging part of your body that you curse incessantly, bad mouth every time you go bathing suit or jeans shopping. But why? If our true beauty lies within us, why do we stress out so much about our thighs, our bellies, our hips, our wrinkles, our legs, our arms, our lips, our cheekbones? I mean- REALLY. Thank JABA (Jesus/Jehovah, Allah, Buddha, Athena, etc) that we actually have all those parts to complain about! Why do we do that?

I know my belly obsession probably stems back to my decades of ballet dancing. I had this ballet Nazi who would rap on my belly with her pointer whenever it pooched out. (And mind you, I was 5’5” and about 105 lbs- and I worked out about 4-6 hours/day, so there couldn’t have been an ounce of fat on me. Yet, the belly did always puff out a bit). Even now, when I donned my pretty red bikini this am (it does help to have a bathing suit you love), I heard her voice saying, “Suck it in! And why can’t you fix that?” Evil bitch. There's nothing wrong with my belly! Yet, here I am today, hiking up my cover up skirt so my gut doesn't show.

After thinking about it all morning, I realized that this kind of thinking does me absolutely no good. Why? Why torture myself? It’s not going to change, and I love most of me. Why can’t I just accept who I am and suck it up (no pun intended). So I have a little gut? So what? I’m kind, generous, talented, caring, honest, and otherwise quite pretty. So why the self-flagellation?

When I came home from the beach, I thought of Pink Posse Dr. Rachel Abrams’ Body Blessing from The Multi-Orgasmic Woman. I teach this blessing to my patients all the time. And yet why don’t I do it more often myself? So this afternoon, I closed the door, took my bikini off, climbed into a warm bath, and spent a few minutes doing this meditation. I want to share it with you. I’m vowing to do it every night this month, until I start to love my body more. Want to join me for Mojo Monday? I swear it’s good for the mojo- and for Owning Your Body.

Here goes, the BODY BLESSING (slightly modified in my own words, but with great big respect to Rachel Abrams, who wrote it).

Body Blessing
1. Sit or lie in a comfortable position.
2. Take three deep breaths into your abdomen and let your body relax.
3. Imagine an image of love (your smiling face, your partner, your child, the sun) in front of you. Take in the loving, warm energy through your third eye (between your two eyes) and direct it, in turn, to each part of your body. Begin with your head and continue down your body to every little part- your hair, your eyes, your nose, your ears, your lips, your cheekbones, your neck, your shoulders, your breasts, your arms, your hands, your belly, your waist, your butt, your back, your genitals, your hips, your thighs, your legs, your ankles, your feet, your toes.
4. Observe any judgments you notice about each body part as you send loving energy. Your judgments often present themselves as blocks when you try to send loving, smiling energy. For example, smile to your arms and notice any judgments that you may have come to your consciousness- “weak, flabby, skin is dry and scaly, ugly elbows, too hairy.” Or in my case, “poochy belly- demonstrates a weakness in me that I can’t control my gut and it insists on sticking out.”
5. Send smiling energy to the body part and shift your intention to see all of the strengths that she possesses, using words silently or aloud to enumerate her positive qualities- “my arms are capable of expressing love, carrying my children, writing, and praying, and they are a beautiful dark brown.” Or in my case, “my belly carried my incredible daughter and helped me bring life into the world. My belly gives Matt and Siena a place to rest their heads when we’re snuggling. Thank you belly.”
6. Imagine the energy of your judgments being released and sent out of your body through your hands and feet. It is helpful to imagine your judgments have a particular color or texture. As you breathe in, send smiling, warm energy to your body part. As you breathe out, imagine the smiling energy filling that part and the judgmental energy flowing out and down your arms or legs and out of your body into the ground.
7. Continue to each body part that you wish to address, becoming aware of your judgments and sending loving energy and affirmations to replace the judgments. The more specific you can be about your judgments and, in particular, your affirmations, the more “clearing” will take place.
8. When you are finished, shake your hands and feet to release any of the trapped negative emotions you may still hold.

Do this daily for the next month, then reassess and see how you feel.

For more juicy thoughts on Owning Your Body, check out this post by @KimberlyFitness.

How was that, Pinkies? I feel better already. And I’m feeling really grateful that my belly is healthy and that is has served one of life’s biggest purposes. What about you? How’s the mojo? Share your experience please!

With a belly full of love,
Lissa

Comments

OnePinky – Owning Pink Meets One Pinky's picture

[...] acceptance that I am

[...] acceptance that I am who I am, and this body is what carries me from A to B? Maybe it’s the Body Blessings I’ve been doing. Maybe it’s related to turning forty and realizing that I have to surrender to [...]

Lissa Rankin's picture

Oh, yes. A Pink God among us.

Oh, yes. A Pink God among us. Thanks Billy! Yes, I am blessed. I know my husband is the key. He is a total rock star and he truly doesn't care what I look like. I know that-deep down- really. If only more men could see past the exterior and love women for what I see- the woman INSIDE.

Billy Shears's picture

I think your husband is the

I think your husband is the key. If more men understood what makes a woman really attractive there would be far fewer anxious women. FYI, I've been married 30+ years; my wife isn't quite as svelte as she used to be, but who cares, neither am I.

Lissa Rankin's picture

Thanks for the hot bod

Thanks for the hot bod comment, Leslee. If only we could see ourselves as other see us, right? But yes, it shouldn't matter how others see us. We need to love ourselves from the inside out. That way, as we age, we attach less what what our bodies look like on the outside and associate more of our sense of self with who we are inside...

Leslee Horner's picture

You totally have a hot bod

You totally have a hot bod Lissa! But I can relate to you on the belly thing. Even before I ever was pregnant I looked about 4 mos along. One of my sorority sisters used to call me Buddha. And I was asked on New Year's day (3 weeks after my youngest daughter's 3rd birthday) if I was expecting. But these days I try not to focus on it and one way I do that is looking straight at myself in the mirror and realize from that view it doesn't look big at all and you can even see the ab muscles I've developed by working out. I also just bought my first bikini in years and I am going to wear it proudly this year, belly or not!

Lissa Rankin's picture

Thank you, Pa.

Thank you, Pa.

Pa Gianni's picture

Beautiful

Beautiful

Lissa Rankin's picture

I agree, Megan. Part of my

I agree, Megan. Part of my mission is to make you realize that you're not alone. As an OB/GYN, I've interacted with thousands of women, and we so often feel like we're the only one struggling. Yet, I see that our stories, while unique, share many common threads. Thanks for noticing. You are SO not alone!

Megan Monique Harner's picture

My favorite thing about your

My favorite thing about your posts, aside from them being incredibly inspiring and vulnerable is that they are so easy to relate to! I think it is important as women, that we are able to connect with other women around us. It gives us a sense of sanity. Thank you!

Susanna's picture

Beautiful beach...beautiful

Beautiful beach...beautiful picture...beautiful you...

Lissa Rankin's picture

Ah, thanks. I bought the red

Ah, thanks. I bought the red bikini when I was pregnant. Wasn't feeling particularly sexy at the time and figured a hot red bikini would help- and it did! But I haven't worn it since. It was time to break it out- and OWN it!

Hanlie's picture

What a wonderful post! I'll

What a wonderful post! I'll definitely be back here soon!

I love your red bikini too!

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