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Riding the Rollercoaster of Life & Letting Go of the Handle

Lissa Rankin's picture

ring_of_fireMy husband and I just took my 3 year old daughter Siena to the fair. I had been feeling a little down before we left. You know how you have those days from time to time where you lose your mojo and get in a funk? Standing in lines with screaming kids and enduring the summer heat didn't sound like my fantasy (curling up with a good book frankly sounded more my style), but I have to think about someone other than me these days, so for Siena's sake, we went to the fair.

The Lights of the Midway Await You

As we stood in the long line outside, peering through the gate at the fire-engine red, lemon yellow, and bright blue amusement part rides, I felt my funk start to dissipate as I watched Siena's excited face, beaming. Then I saw them, off in the distance- the rollercoasters- and my heart skipped a beat. Lost in my funk, I had forgotten about the rollercoasters. Once we sludged through the line and earned our entrance to the midway, Siena flung her arms out to the side and went running off to the spinny cars, yelling "I want the Pink one, Mommy! I want to Own Pink!" (I swear, I'm not brainwashing the kid). Dutiful mother that I aspire to be, I spent the first half hour watching Siena spin in circles on the kiddy rides. But the rollercoasters in the distance sang their siren song, and I felt my heart yearning, as my inner child called out.

My sweet husband Matt knew I'd been in a bit of funk, doubting myself and second guessing the risky direction I've chosen for our life. He also knows how much I love rollercoasters. For my 35th birthday a few years back, he surprised me by taking me to Six Flags during the off-season so I could ride rollercoasters all day long without waiting in line. By the twenty-somethingth rollercoaster, he felt queasy and opted to stand on the sidelines while I dipped, spun, and tipped upside down. Since having a child, I haven’t been able to do the same.

Follow Your Bliss

But there we were, at the fair, and the Ring of Fire was calling my name. Sweet Matt saw me oogling the rollercoaster and urged me to go while he watched Siena. I felt torn- play dutiful Mama, waving and clapping and egging on my daughter. Or follow my bliss and high tail it to the rollercoaster. So what did I do? You guessed it. I opted for getting my mojo back.

ringoffire line smThere I was, waiting in line with a crowd of kids at least twenty years my junior, and finally, it was my turn. I felt that familiar butterfly feeling in my tummy as I strapped myself in right across from this pre-teen girl with a giant grin on her face. Then whoosh! We were off, and I was laughing hysterically, as was the young girl across from me. You know that goofy laughter that just bubbles up from inside of you and won’t be contained, not even in church?

Let Go Of the Handle

I could see Siena down below, cheering me on, yelling “Go Mommy!” As we spun upside down, I found myself clinging to the safety bar locked over my body, holding my breath. Then after a few spins with gravity, I realized I was doing the very thing I vow not to do- I was clinging to the proverbial handle.ringoffirelissasm

Just like that, I let go, throwing my hands up in the air, letting the wind carry me. I could feel the tension release within me, as my body filled with light and life and the funk that had overtaken me washed away. I could see my daughter laughing and grinning, reminding me that it's okay to folllowing my own bliss, even as a mother.

Let The Funk Wash Away

I thought back over my week of helping moderate a heavy but invaluable conversation about the difference between depression and losing your mojo. I reflected on the Pretty Pink Pussy Preoccupation and how much we need to humanize each other, rather than limit each other or put each other in boxes. I thought about the clients I saw in my private practice and how we all struggle from time to time, riding the rollercoaster of life, through the ups, the downs, and the topsy turvys. During those rocky times, when we find ourselves in a funk, we can seek unity and love in the collective Oneness, or we can stay isolated, riding the rollercoaster alone- in fear and loneliness. These thoughts all flashed through my head like a movie screen, as I spun around and around, feeling my funk fall away like pennies from my upside down pockets. As I surrendered to the experience- to life- I felt my whole body fill with the bright white light of JOY.

When the ride ended, I felt light as a feather (a little dizzy, maybe, but in a good way). I skipped off the rollercoaster, hugged my family, and danced off to the next rollercoaster. Now, as I reflect, I realize there are many things to be learned from riding rollercoasters. Like all things in life, the life lessons go much deeper than the surface of the experience.

Life Lessons I Learned From A Day of Riding Rollercoasters



1. In a funk? Get up and get outside of yourself. There's a whole wide world waiting for you to explore, and somewhere along the way, you just might find your joy.

2. Is fear keeping you from trying something potentially thrilling? Try pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone. It’s good for the mojo.

3. It’s not all about the kids. Mommys and Daddys are allowed to have fun too. Following the whims of your inner child models joy and light-hearted fun for your child. Isn’t that as important as snapping photos while they’re on the carousel?

4. Age is a state of mind. Just because you grow up doesn’t mean you can’t reclaim the joys of being sixteen at the local fair.

5. While smooth sailing may seem appealing to those of us in crisis, riding the waves (or the rollercoasters) keeps life interesting.


6. Life really is more fun when you let go of the handle and surrender to the process.monks_roller_coaster_large


Wheeeeeeeeee…….
Lissa

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When I Grow Up - The Blog » Blog Archive » Wonderful (Links)'s picture

[...] Riding the Roller

[...] Riding the Roller Coaster of Life & Letting Go of the Handle & Mojo Mondays: Write Your Personal Mission Statement on Owning Pink [...]

When I Grow Up - The Blog » Blog Archive » Tough (Question) 's picture

[...] a play-by-play of

[...] a play-by-play of climbing up the tall ladder & it almost made me pee myself. Maybe because this post made me actually want to ride an upside-down roller coaster, while an old part of me says, “No [...]

Susan Lissberger's picture

My life's motto is: how well

My life's motto is: how well can I love, How well can I live, How well can I let go..........

I just haven't mastered it yet!! Ohhh I have tried and continue each day, sometimes on the same task. If I have done my best, I am content.

What I am saying is, I think you ARE riding "LIFES BIG ONE" with all the grace, courage and passion that so evidently lives within you.

You inspire me.........I imagine you are already climbing up and into your next big adventure in life with girlish squeals of delight the entire way....You make me giggle!!

Bon Weekend.........

Lissa Rankin's picture

Love that idea, Susan! A

Love that idea, Susan! A workshop at Six Flags where we all practice letting go of the handle like the monks! Life IS for the living, eh? But trust me, I've white-knuckled it through many roller-coasters (and even more life experiences). What I write about is how I strive to live- not always how I succeed in doing so! But yes, the monks are an inspiration, aren't they? It's all about surrender....

Susan Lissberger's picture

That was GREAT

That was GREAT Lissa!!!!!!!!!!!, I felt I was on that ride of life with you. Perked me right up. Just what I needed.

I love the idea of riding life's waves gracefully, but am more of a white knuckled act when it comes to the bigger things in life such as that monster sized roller coaster. I might have become one of those people who could appreciate the ride more when it was over, closing my eyes tightly during the ride and thankful I survived it. I think you should have a "come ride the big one with me" workshop. We would probably all sign up for that.....Our strong, yet fragile, perfect big lives sure lends itself to some great metaphors. You hit it square in the eyes on this one. Made my mind start working in so many directions. Love when that happens....

You are too cute for words, and the monks riding the waves of the roller coaster warmed my heart to no end. I think I need to post that picture on my front door, so as I enter into each day, I can see that friendly little reminder. Let go, and LIVE with all you GOT!!!!!!!

Thank you, that just woke me from a little funk.

Lissa Rankin's picture

Dear Pink Heels, That is the

Dear Pink Heels, That is the most beautiful experience I have gained since I began writing for Owning Pink- it forces me to look metaphorically at the details of my life, which allows me to live a life overflowing with purpose. I encourage everyone to do the same. We can't always change our circumstances, but we can see things with fresh eyes, and in doing so, we turn lead into gold.

Pink Heels's picture

Your list of life lessons

Your list of life lessons reminded me to stop each day and appreciate my experiences from the day. Far too often, I simply rush through my day without acknowledging the life lessons that I have learned.

Lissa Rankin's picture

Ooohh- I've always wanted to

Ooohh- I've always wanted to try the trapeze! Swing once for me!

Michelle | When I Grow Up Coach's picture

Such a great way of thinking

Such a great way of thinking about it, Lissa - although I know it's easier said then done! I think I'm going to start with trapeze lessons - I don't know why, but it seems less scary - and take it from there. If I freeze I'll use "surrender the fear" as my mantra!

Lissa Rankin's picture

The fear is usually what

The fear is usually what holds us back, Michelle. If you can surrender the fear, it's a thrill!

Michelle | When I Grow Up Coach's picture

Riding an upside-down

Riding an upside-down rollercoaster is one of my biggest fears. You actually made it sound fun, Lisa! I'm not sure I'll ever be at the point where I'll be giggling pre-ride (or during!), but you might have egged me just a bit closer in conquering this fear. Thanks for the wonderful post!

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