I agree, Kris! Plus, having a healthy sex life serves as a good role model for your kids as they grow up. My parents had a healthy sex life and I always knew that growing up. It actually made me feel more secure knowing that my parents were still attracted to each other after all those years, since my friends parents were all getting divorced. I think modeling healthy sexuality improves the likelihood that kids will grow up without a slew of sexual hangups. Thanks for being here with us Kris!

I'm not saying NO TV, since that is a bit drastic for some, but limit it each night. It will give you tons more time. Just watch and see.

My husband was a TV addict and by the time the TV went off I was too tired, especially with young kids. So first we removed the TV from the bedroom and never let it return. Then we turned off the TV immediately after his favorite show. Next we only turned on the TV for his favorite shows and soon we only turned on the TV several days a week. Wa La! We suddenly had time for sex. Try it is TV is interfering. IT works but it is a gradual change.

Oh, honey. Been there. Really. There's hope. Set the intention, decide to make it important in your life, and watch things unfold...

I'm going to post more about this in upcoming posts. Stay tuned. But in the meantime, accept what is, forgive yourself and your husband, assess whether you're invested in making things different, and move forward. Within you lies the power to chance your life. If you care enough, you can do it! If you accept things as they are, that's okay too. It's all about choosing the life you wish to live.

xoxo Lissa

Sarah, When my husband came down with MS, we attended a sex therapist to deal with the problems that MS can bring to a relationship. It was very helpful.She was a little old lady in our church, no less. Really! But the techniques she helped us with added immeasurably for the next 25 years of sex. My husband died at age 60 but our sexual relationship added to the quality of our marriage until the end.So now I"m in that cave with you. But with his brain all muddled from his cognitive problem and his brain tumor he used to tell our kids we still did the deed three times a week. NOT! But if he thought we did and it made him happy, I'm happy. But it can be good as long as you are both healthy enough for it, but it takes communication. My husband told me before we got married ( or had sex) that communication was the basis for our marriage and it really helped us have a great marriage for 40 years. I think young people assume they won't have sex when they are older. Not so, unless you chose that road.

Heehee...It's ok. In my head I balance out the plus & minus. Sure sometimes I think it'd be great to have more of it, but that's just not gonna happen. I've got great kids, a good life, great ambitions and a husband. This man is a father to the kids, treats me well & never cheats. The alternatives? I hated being single.

Sex is not something I'd walk across the street for (that's weird, yes, I'm aware of that)It's far to damn much effort for the potential of a pitiful prize at the end. It got to the point at one time in marriage where just the thought of it made me nauseous. Like you said-there was other stuff going on at the time.

I'm frankly amazed at some folks total fixation on sexual activity. It just never worked for me. I just nod my head, smile & pretend I enjoy it as much as they do. They'll talk of politics or religion after awhile, then I'll join the convo :)

Sneaking of to the cave (It's sunday-I'm writing too much)

Sex serves as healthy glue in our relationships. As my mom once told me, when sex is good, it's only 10% of the relationship. When it's bad, it's 90%. If you want to keep your mojo and your marriage healthy, make time to connect with your lover. I have some patients that swear they would be fine if they never have sex again. Especially those with young children. But the truth is, sexless relationships don't usually survive. For those patients, I pull out my prescription pad and write this: "Have sex at least once a week." I sign it and hand it to them as a reminder. Some get pissed off. "Why should i have sex if I don't feel like it?" Chances are, if you don't feel like it, there's other stuff going on. Maybe you need more sleep, more help around the house, more time to yourself, or marriage counseling. If you're one of those women, examine your feelings. Why don't you want to have sex? It's a question worth asking. Your inner voice may have much to say.

I can definitely see how sex can have that much of an influence over our moods, production, etc. I know that when Brawn (The BF) and I got for more than a week without having sex we are noticeably more irritable with each other. I do my best to not let that many days go past us. Fighting is not in our nature. Great article, thanks!