This morning, I am at the DMV, waiting to get my license. I procrastinated too long to do this process the civil way- with an appointment. Instead, I am waiting in the non-appointment line, with everyone else who was too dense to make an appointment, as we watch those with appointments come and go. They’ve tried to spruce it up with a few festive pumpkins and spider webs, but the minute you walk in, you know that this is a place you don’t want to be. The walls here are a dingy teal color (don’t they know this color went out of style in the ‘80s?). The floor is grayish seafoam-green linoleum tile. Fluorescent lights glare down at us garishly, turning us all into spooky, thin-skinned ghouls. Everyone sitting around me looks glum, with furrowed brows and slumped shoulders. Men in three piece suits intermingle with hoodlums sporting gangster tattoos. The only person who looks remotely happy to be here is the teenager who is probably getting her driver’s license for the first time, and she’s biting her nails. A few people make eye contact with me as I’m gazing around, and I smile. My smile scares them away, as if it might be contagious. I am left alone.

Places We Don't Want to Be

Being here reminds me that we all find ourselves in circumstances we’d rather avoid. Whether you’re sitting in the dentist’s chair getting your tooth drilled or standing in line at a soup kitchen to fill your hungry belly or waiting for the chemotherapy to drip into your veins or counting the minutes until your jail time is done or waiting at the DMV, life inevitably puts you in situations you’d rather skip. When these things happen, it seems to me that many people turn grumpy. They bitch about their circumstances, blame the system, and stew. I can see the people around me doing it right now. One guy is cussing out the woman behind the counter, who is just doing her job. Someone else is ranting about how it’s not his fault that he lost his license. It’s those damn cops- the fascist police state who are committed to oppressing us and taking away our rights. His face is turning bright red, and you can almost see the steam coming out of his ears.

I don’t want to be here either. I’d rather be home working on my book, or, frankly, doing just about anything other than this. But I’m not going to let it get me down. Instead, I’m closing my eyes and doing a little grounding meditation. I’m looking at the people behind the counter and opening my heart to them, knowing that some of them are Pinkies, and they’re doing the best they can at a thankless job. I’m smiling at the strangers around me, hoping that maybe my smile can brighten their day, just a wee bit. I’m writing about this experience to keep my heart is a positive place, and to keep my mojo in the middle of a DMV line. I’m finding it not only possible, but easy. It’s all in your frame of mind.

Tips on Keeping Your Mojo

What about you Pinkies? Do you find yourself complaining and feeling grumpy when you have to do something you’d rather skip? Do you darken your energy field and become negative, emanating crankiness? Do you fail to take responsibility for what you know in a consequence you must endure? Are you able to find your smile in the midst of tedium, boredom, discomfort, or crisis?

If you find that you’re letting a bad attitude sap your mojo, here are some tips:

1. Accept that some experiences are simply not pleasant. Think of them as the foils that remind us of the ecstasies in life.
2. Open your heart to the people around you, even if they seem to be part of the problem. Treat them with compassion and loving kindness. Even if it doesn’t change their day (and it may!), it will change yours.
3. Seek the joy in every situation. Think metaphorically. Surely, you can identify one thing in the circumstance you dread that you can view with fresh eyes. Revel in those little things.
4. Close your eyes and allow your mind to take you to a place you’d rather be. Visualize a safe, nurturing, beautiful, peaceful place and go there in your mind.
5. Count the things in your life for which you are grateful. Gratitude takes away the power of negative experiences.
6. Smile. Laugh, even. You will release happy chemicals that will make you feel better, even in the midst of something you dread.
7. Remember that nothing is permanent – neither the good nor the bad. If you’re feeling unhappy in this moment, just wait a while. This too shall pass.
8. Accept responsibility when these experiences result from your own mistakes. It may not be your fault that you’re getting chemo, but if you have to sit in traffic school because you were speeding, don’t blame the cop. Learn from your mistake and let it go.
9. Pray. Ask the Universe to help you have a change of heart. You might be surprised at the miracles that can happen.
10. Don’t let one negative experience affect your whole day. Experience it. Look for the good in it. Then let it go. Life is too short to wallow.

Go forth in love, Pinkies. I challenge you. Next time you find yourself somewhere you’d rather not be, try to shift how you feel. You can find your mojo anywhere. It’s all in your perspective.

Oooh- that’s me! G22! Gotta go.

Happy to be wherever I am,

Lissa