Megan, the Pink Lovemuffin, back in high school (not so long ago!)

We at Owning Pink recently received a message from teen Pink Goddess Ashley, asking for some guidance on how to navigate the struggles of the teen years with Pinkness. Because Lovemuffin Megan is just barely out of the teen years herself (but wise beyond her years), we asked her to write this post for Ashley. So Ashley, dearest, this one's for you. Hit it, Lovemuffin!

It’s been less than five years since I rounded out my teenage years: a period of time in my life that seemed to drag on forever. It was a series of ups, downs, and turn-arounds, not to mention a couple moments of “what the hell was I thinking?!” However, living through the events, people and situations I endured as teen versus looking back on them now … well, it is as if I am on another continent, looking in on the life of a person I never even knew.

I can recall specific times where my emotions seemed like they were too much to handle. Travis - my first boyfriend and my first kiss - dumped me, and everyone knew about it. At the time I felt like my life was over, like the sadness would never pass. However, lo and behold, as soon as I found the next boy I thought was cute, Travis was the furthest thing from my thoughts.

It would be fun to go back and talk to Teen Lovemuffin. But since we live in a time and space where journeying back through time isn’t possible, I will share my current knowledge with the Pink Teens out there reading this. The ones who are in search of ways to keep their Mojo in the midst of the drama, chaos and uncertainty of junior high and high school.

We’re Always Growing


The most important thing I can say to you is not to settle into the concept that you know everything there is to know about life (nor will you ever!). This might come as a shock at first, but the more you think about it, the more exciting it is. It means that there will always be something to live for, something to learn, and something to grow from as a person. Keep this in mind as you journey through your teenage years. Those people at school that you just can’t stand, the way your parents expect you to finish your homework and get along with your siblings … instead of getting upset about these things, look and see if there is a lesson in it for you. Is there anything you can learn from this situation - about yourself or in how you treat others - that you didn’t know before?

Nothing Stays the Same

Another important truth is that the negative ways we might be treated in school never last. I cannot tell you how many peers I have run into over the past five years that would not even look at me in high school. Now they hug me, text me and are curious about how I am doing and what is going on in my life. Remember that nothing stays the same. The way that you are evolving into the person you most desire to be stands true for others as well.

The best way to tackle ignorance (which is where meanness comes from) is to stand in the place of love, no matter what. When the bully pushes you or calls you names, do not sink down to their level and hate back. Remember that everyone has their story. Try to feel love in your heart for them, and hope that they eventually find the love in their soul to live better and treat others with respect. This is the best thing you can do for yourself and for them.

Remember How Magnificent You Are

Finally, embrace the fabulousness that is YOU. Of course these years are going to be awkward- you are still growing and feeling out who it is you want to be in the world. (P.S. many of us grown-ups are still doing that!) Take pride in knowing that you are learning, discovering, developing and THRIVING! Find what it is that makes you happy and feeds your soul. What makes you excited about waking up each day? What kinds of happiness can you find within yourself? I promise that as long as you go searching for Happy Mojo outside yourself, you might find it temporarily, but it will not last. All that you need to live, thrive and love lives within you. And THAT is the truth.

Never forget that you are shining Goddess/God always radiating the Pink light within. Especially in those moments when you think it is gone, remember that we Pinkies are here watching, waiting for you to shine your full brilliance.

Some Tips on Owning Pink as a Teenager From Lissa (who feels like she was a teen just yesterday but has 20 years of life experience since then...)

1. Try to see the PINK in everyone, even if they seem mean on the surface. Remember that most unkindness comes from fear, and fear's antidote is love.

2. Trust in the core of who you are. Remember that you're not defined by grades, clothes, boyfriends, or labels. You are YOU- and that is valuable.

3. Stay true to yourself. Don't let others pressure you into being who you're not. It's tempting to drink, use drugs, have sex, break laws, treat someone unkindly, or do other things that take you out of your integrity- just to fit in. But remember, fitting in is not the goal. Inner peace is.

4. Open your heart. Live from a place of love and let it spill over into everything you do.

5. Honor your body. Your body is the vessel for the divine being that you are. Your body does not define you- it is merely a home for the spirit within. Treat it with respect and insist that others do the same.

6. Nurture your spirit. I know your parents may have pushed religion down your throat like a bitter pill, and if you're like I was, you rebel against what has been forced on you. But remember that religion is about humans- spirituality is about the divine Spirit. Own your spirituality, in whatever way feels authentic to you, even if it's not exactly what your parents believe.

7. Be a leader of light instead of a follower of darkness. Let your heart and your spirit shine forth.

8. Don't sell yourself out. Know that you are precious, beautiful and magnificent, just the way you are. You don't need the validation of others.

9. Don't be afraid of your own creativity. Others may try to limit you or make you stay between the lines. Go crazy with creativity and own it!

10. Treat others with respect. Mean Girls are definitely not Owning Pink (not that we can't love them anyway.) Know that your parents are doing the best they can, that your teachers have your best interests at heart, that your friends are trying to be good friends, that guys are just as confused as you, and that everyone makes mistakes. Forgive, love, be respectful, and hold tightly to the heart of yourself.

What about you Teen Pinkies and Grown-Up Pinkies? Does any of this resonate with you? What words of wisdom do you have to share for those teens out there who are fighting for their Mojo? And what about you grown up Pinkies? Any wise words to share with the teen Pinkies among us?

Still growing,

Megan (&Lissa)

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