Owning Pink Bloggers

To be fully healthy, you must nourish all parts of yourself.

Danielle Dowling

Danielle Dowling M.A.'s picture

Self Sabotage Is A Bitch

Walking away

Allow me to set the scene:

I’m talking to a client who has recently broken up with an amazing guy who worshiped the ground she floated over.

“Why did you walk away from him?”

“I don’t know, ” she said mystified and withdrawn.

“Could it be because you were afraid of having what you wanted?”  I offered.

Lightbulb.  Yes, that’s it.

Self sabotage is a bitch. And she’ll cost you.

We reach for self sabotage when we fear our own empowerment.

We think it’s easier to stay where we are.
To dig our heels in + keep carrying on in the same ol’ comfortable
(yet most likely unempowered) way.

Why?

Because subconsciously we perceive ‘staying put’ as less painful than erecting + nurturing a new (more rich, more vibrant ) mindset.

Why?
Change can = pain.

So why push forward any.way. you can?
Because it’s worth it.

Know with every fiber of your being that what you want the most: the relationship, the career, the body, the chance – all lie on the other side of your willingness to change.

Analyze your motivations; get curious.
Why are you afraid to have what you want most?
Why are you NOT leaning in?
Curiosity packs the power to move you forward.
Let it.

Refuse and the long term pain of  sabotage has the potential to dismantle youTo rob you of who you seek to be;  of where you aspire to ascend to.

Self-sabotage will snatch from your clutches:
relationships
careers
progress
body
purpose
confidence
hope
curiosity
dedication
clarity
cash flow
kindness
equilibrium
communication
aspiration
commitment
regard
connection
 
How to you stop self-sabotage in its tracks:
  • When you feel yourself edging out of your comfort zone (and then panicking and wanting to return to The Known), take a deep breath and remember: you’re not going to die.
  • When you find yourself engaging in sabotaging behavior – dating ‘Bad Boys,’ skipping the gym, missing deadlines, not returning the call, email, text – ask yourself “Is this getting me closer to where I want to go?”
  • When you’re avoiding The Hard Work you have to do to get where you want to go – the tough conversations, the long hours, the early morning workouts – say “I love myself enough to do this.”

Shelve your fear, loosen your shackles and desire a life of satisfaction more than you begrudge change; more than the pain of discovery and the responsibility of awareness.

And then act.

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Sometimes It's Not OK

I don’t know how you feel.

I can only remember how I felt when it happened to me.

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Amp Up Your Sexy With Men (Avoid These 3 Missteps)

So what is it about the woman that always gets the guy?  You know who I’m talking about.

Every guy you know thinks she’s cool/smart/funny.  Men get giddy around her.  Conversations stall when she walks into a room.

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If You Want Something, Ask

 
“Ask and ye shall receive.”

Try it.

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Life Balance Is Overrated

balance

 

For the last month I’ve been haunted by my own tag line:
“Helping Women Leaders Balance Professional Success + Love.”

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You're Not Going To Die

 

IF you don’t get the job,
the call-back,
the promotion.

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Let Go

We’ve talked about sucking it up.  About being awesome.

But what about letting go?  Does letting go = giving up?  Why should you let go?

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The Necessary Brilliance Of Easing Up


 

Think less.
Bitch less.
Push less.
+ create more.

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Soulmates & The One


 

We all want a soulmate.

“The One.”

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Enough With Feeling Guilty For What You Want

“I shouldn’t be into him, but I totally am. Shouldn’t I be looking for someone who makes more money?”

“That corner office.  I want it. I feel bad for letting my ambition consume me, but I want my name on that door more than I want anything else.”

“Everyone I know is settling down.  I guess I should start looking for someone stable to build a life with but I’m enjoying just dating and pursuing my career.”

“My gut instinct is telling me I can work less at my day job + transition to my passion project. But my family keeps telling me not to quit yet.”

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