“Love and intimacy are at the root of what makes us sick and what makes us well, what causes sadness and what brings happiness, what makes us suffer and what leads to healing… I am not aware of any other factor in medicine - not diet, not smoking, not exercise, not stress, not genetics, not drugs, not surgery - that has a greater impact on our quality of life, incidence of illness and premature death from all causes.”
~ Dr. Dean Ornish
I love that quote.
I mean, I love it when science backs me up.
As an intimacy coach, I see sex/love/intimacy as one of, if not the most, important factor governing happiness in one’s life.
When this area is thriving, it spills over and uplifts every other area of our lives. When it is lackluster, it sucks everything else into it like a vacuum.
Since we live in a culture that excommunicates sex—encouraging us to shunt off its power and deny its pleasure—it’s no wonder that people are confused.
On the one hand, there is a natural urge that arises to touch, to love, to enter into the deep, intense, surrendered space of conscious, sexual connection.
On the other hand, we have to fight against any internalized voices telling us that sex is a minor part of life or a relationship. Or worse, that there’s something bad about it.
Until they reconcile these dichotomies and seek to consciously heal them, most people remain stuck in indecision.
Yet, the impact of such indecision shows up in marriages that wilt and vitality that dulls.
Vulnerable, heart-opened sexual connection deepens love. It amplifies the power of it. If you want to have more energy, charisma, confidence, beauty, intelligence and overall flow in life, prioritize your intimate life.
Schedule sex dates: Yes. Slot them into your calendar to ensure they happen. Carve out time to emotionally connect and clear the air with your partner. Remember those hours of euphoric conversation you could have when you first got together? You can have that again—if you prioritize it.
Do you plan extended sex dates? Hours at a time? Weekends? Weeks?
On a scale of 1-10, how much do you prioritize your intimate connection? Where would you like it to be?
I know where I’d like to see you have it: at an 8+.
Even if you are single, you can cultivate your own intimate growth: physically and emotionally and psychologically by working on issues that you know keep you from going deeper.
When you put your intimate life near the top of your priority list, it will give back to you miraculous, life-changing gifts.
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