I realized recently that I hold one powerful limiting belief -- that good things are always hard, and anything or anyone worth it will be difficult. A valuable relationship will challenge you and make you work for it. A killer creative project will suck the life out of you. Making it big in business will require you to work your ass off. You get the picture.

But during a recent astrology session with Astro Twin Ophira Edut, she told me that Pluto lies in my first house of births. Because of this, she asked me about my own birth. Was my birth easy or hard?

I laughed.

My birth was pretty famously hard.

My father was a medical student, and I was three weeks overdue when I finally decided to make my appearance in the world. But I rarely do things the usual way, and I decided to come out creatively. Usually a baby comes out occiput first, meaning that the back of the baby’s head is the first part to traverse the birth canal.

But not me. Oh no, baby. I like to do it the hard way, so I presented face first, so when the doctor examined my mother to find out how dilated she was, he stuck his finger up my little infant nostril and nearly poked me in the eye. Because of the rare and unusual way I decided to enter the world, my mother became the guinea pig at the hospital where my father was training. My poor 23-year-old mom got poked and prodded by all the medical students (some of whom were friends of hers) because most had never examined a pregnant woman with a baby presenting face first.

My ever-pleasing mother tolerated all these hands in her vagina for a while, until she finally hit her wall and said ENOUGH. She charged one of the medical students to guard the door. And she pronounced -- no more fingers in my cooch!

30-some hours later, Mom was still in labor. These days, she would have had a C-section, but her British doctor was very anti-C-section and wouldn’t perform the surgery. Mom was suffering by this point. And begging for the whole thing to be over.

And finally, on April 24, 1969 (yes, my birthday is this weekend!), I was born, my face black and blue, my eyes swollen shut, like I had just barely survived a fight.

Fighting to give birth

According to Ophira, this difficult birth may be the astrological origin of my limiting belief that life always has to be hard. My soul thinks you have to fight tooth and nail to bring yourself -- or your relationships or your creative projects -- into the world.

When I think back, nearly every big birth in my life has been accompanied by loss and hardship. When my first husband and I got married and rode off into the sunset in a white horse and buggy, our buggy was hit by a car and we spent our wedding night recovering from the accident. The day I finished taking my medical boards, my husband’s mom was diagnosed with a brain tumor. And then there was the mother of all traumatic births -- my Perfect Storm, when I gave birth to my daughter by C-section, while my dog died, my brother wound up in liver failure, and my father passed away, all within two weeks.

Even giving birth to my book What’s Up Down There? required experiencing a painful meltdown on the day before my book released. (If you’re really curious, you can watch my meltdown on video here.)

So it’s no wonder I think birthing new things into the world must be hard.

But on a recent trip to Harbin Hot Springs, Ophira charged me to learn the lesson my soul was supposed to learn so I don’t have to keep experiencing painful births.

What lesson did I learn during my astrological rebirth?

It doesn’t have to be hard.

Life can be easy. Good things can happen effortlessly.

Wow. Talk about life-changing. And although my mind did a reboot and I’ve changed my thinking, sometimes the body holds muscle memory about how things used to be.

So this week, I've been in Lake Tahoe, and I spent the whole week cruising down a mountain on skis. And while I was engaging in one my very favorite activities, I remembered what I’ve learned from my new rock star friend Gabrielle Bernstein, the ~ING girl and author of Add More –ING to Your Life: A Hip Guide To Happiness. Gabby, whose books and teachings are based on A Course In Miracles, teaches that we need to retrain our bodies and minds by linking physical activities with positive thinking affirmations and mantras. For example, go surfing, and repeat mantras like, “I go with the flow.”

So today, while ski-ING, I decided to take Gabby’s advance. My ~ING mantras were “Life is easy and effortless,” and, “It doesn’t have to be hard.” As I zipped down the hill, feeling that rush in my chest that always accompanies one of my favorite sports, I felt these words start to sink into my body. I skied for eight hours straight, and the whole time, I repeated these words. It doesn’t have to be hard. Life is easy and effortless.

And now as I reflect, I wonder what will happen. What could my life be like if good things happened without struggle? What if I could just sit back and receive blessings with grace and gratitude? What if life doesn’t have to be hard?

Oh yeah, baby. Bring it.

What if life didn’t have to be hard for you either? How would that feel?

What limiting beliefs do you hold? How might you add more ~ING to your life? What physical activity could you add to a mantra in order to teach your body that what you say is true? Please share your thoughts with me here.

Eas-ING into my new life,

Lissa

Lissa Rankin, MD: Founder of OwningPink.com, Pink Medicine Woman coach, motivational speaker, and author of What’s Up Down There? Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend and Encaustic Art: The Complete Guide To Creating Fine Art With Wax.