For most of us, Memorial Day weekend means picnics, water sports, booze, friends and family, music, and an excuse to let loose before getting back to the grind on Tuesday. But for people like Julia, it’s a day of observance, of honoring those we have lost in war, of tears.

You see, Julia was only four when her father died in World War II. And after growing up without a father, she gave birth to a son who wanted to honor the memory of the grandfather he never met by serving his country long before the draft in the Vietnam War. 

He died too.

And now Julia’s granddaughter is deployed in Iraq, and her young son hasn’t seen his Mama for six months.

Memorial Day is not a picnic for Julia. She doesn’t drink beer or listen to concerts. She doesn’t throw beach balls or eat barbecued chicken.

It’s tempting to get angry on Memorial Day, not just because others often forget what it’s meant to observe, but because war has robbed her of her family. But Julia has gotten through the anger phase of her grief and resides peacefully, if not joyfully, in the acceptance phase. So instead of choosing to feel bitter or resentful, she lights candles, picks bouquets of wildflowers, visits graves, goes to church, and prays that her granddaughter and all the other soldiers will come home safely.

On this Memorial Day, may all of us, not just the ones with loved ones fighting for our national security overseas, but those who enjoy the freedom and safety they provide us, take a moment of silence in honor of our war wounded, those we’ve lost, and those who sacrifice their lives to keep us free.

May we put down the beach ball, skip the beer, and take flowers to someone else’s grave, in observance of those who have proudly served our country, even at the risk of losing everything.

May we thank God for watching over us, guiding and protecting our troops, and helping us heal international wounds so we all may have peace on earth.

This is my prayer this Memorial Day. 

And like Julia, I will light candles today, spend time in silence, and remember…

Will you? How do you observe Memorial Day? Have you lost anyone you loved to war? How might you be present and mindful on this day?

Remembering,

Lissa

Lissa Rankin, MD: Founder of OwningPink.com, Pink Medicine Woman coach, motivational speaker, and author of What’s Up Down There? Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend and Encaustic Art: The Complete Guide To Creating Fine Art With Wax.