When I first found my way to the right spiritual path for me, the first AHA I had was that The Devil I’d been raised to believe in didn’t exist. I realized that all the stuff the devil was accused of doing, was actually done by my big, fat ego. So when I connected the dots I concluded Ego was The Devil. When I started reading Wayne Dyer’s books I found another definition of Ego. "Edging God Out." So Ego was what was left when you took God out of the equation and what was left acted an awful lot like The Devil.
I thought from that point the journey would be easy. Once I knew what ego was it should be simple to overcome. I did experience growth. Certain aspects of my ego fell away, often after rearing its ugly head in some dramatic fashion. And slowly but surely my ego became less devilish. It no longer had the qualities of a saboteur, but it hadn’t disappeared, nor had it been overcome.
I’ve recently begun to see Ego as something different. I think about how us humans seem to be all about self-preservation. Everything we do can be tracked back to the need to feel safe, secure, and loved. The Ego is in the drivers’ seat of that self-preservation vehicle. When I think about protecting self, the image that comes to mind is that of a helicopter mom. Our ego is the mother of all OVERPROTECTIVE mothers and we’re the kids all grown up and still living under her roof.
I have a friend who offers a service called “ego-busting.” During the session she throws out messages and has you “bust” them by connecting with your inner child and finding the truth of the situation. Most of the ego messages are the things that are supposed to keep you “safe” but more often then not they’re messages that keep you firmly planted right where you are. They keep you from following your heart and taking risks. They keep you trapped in the status quo. They keep you from making the changes that your soul is crying out for you to make.
Ego will tell you to be careful when you start to climb the tree. Forget how exhilarating it might feel when you reach the top, the most important thing is NOT to fall. Ego reminds you not to leave the house looking like that, if you forget to wear that mask of yours the others might reject you. Rejection might be worse than falling out of a tree you know! Ego will keep you as close as it can for as long as it can, but all it really wants is for you to be safe. All it really is is the collection of opinions of all the mothers and fathers that came before.
I think the really important thing to do is listen with an open heart to what my ego tells me and ask if what is says is really true or if it’s just being overprotective. It’s pretty easy to recognize the ego messages because the answer to “is it really true” is always no. Then you bust through the message by asking what your inner child or higher self thinks. The inner child and higher self both reside within your heart. They know your soul’s desires and path. They’ll tell you the truth and that truth will be comforting.
I have reached a place where the ego is something I can have respect for. I understand that it keeps me human and ties me emapthetically to the people in my life. I’m not in a hurry to escape it anymore, but I do want to move out of its house. Just like an overprotective mom, I’m ok with the occasional visit but I don’t want it running my life.
Love and Light,
Visit my website: www.lesleehorner.com
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