Let's just start there.
One of the main areas that I need constant improvement in is my philosophy and understanding of relationships and sexuality. I recall once being in a long term relationship where I was so convinced the sex was amazing that I even told the guy, "Should we break up, I might have to join a nunnery." This was because, at the time, he had been the only man that I experienced an orgasm with vaginally. I thought this must be some special miracle. I thought his amazing body could substitute for his subpar kisses. I thought the athletic sex substituted for his constant absence. I thought the orgasm meant no one else could help me physically feel the same way.
In retrospect, it's ridiculous to me that I gave him the responsibility for my pleasure. I want to give my younger self grace but I can't believe how silly I must have been to say that I'd have to join a nunnery if we broke up. How could I make such an assumption? Aren't there over 3 billion men in the world? Even if some of them are married, attracted to other men, too young, too old and just wouldn't work, there are still many that have the possibility of having a great relationship with me.
The potential of a great relationship with someone else isn't even the point. I am responsible for my pleasure! I am responsible for my own fulfillment, joy and satisfaction. Contentment lies in me, my mindset and what I pursue. Having chemistry with someone doesn't mean that's your only choice for pleasure. The world does not end when your present moment or relationship ends.
No matter your status in a relationship, you are ultimately responsible for your pleasure, your happiness and your sanity. Own that power.
Don't put up with bullshit just because the sex may be great, or s(he) looks great or you've been together for ten years. You KNOW without a doubt what it is you want from your relationships, from your career, from everything and every step should be towards those desires.
Taking responsibility for your pleasure is a wonderful, sensational experience but it also means adjusting limited beliefs and expectations in relationships.
Have you ever given someone else the responsibility of your own pleasure? What does it mean for you to take responsibility for your own pleasure?
I wish for you an incredible existence full of pleasure, delight and love. Have a great day.
Sheena LaShay is a writer, siren and artist that seeks to inspire you to live an authentic and powerful life. You can also find Sheena at www.SheenaLaShay.com.
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