Do you ever feel like you’ve cheated yourself – sacrificed your wants, needs and values – by lying about how you feel -- perhaps for someone else’s sake? How often have you wanted to say NO but instead responded with Yes to please others?

In our world of dualities, it seems like there is always a choice – yes or no, good or bad, right or wrong – and there is always someone bombarding us with their answer. But how do you determine your answer?

Honor Your Voice

Most likely, you already know your answer; you just haven’t found the courage to own your answer. Maybe you’re confidence isn’t at its peak, so it’s easier to just say what people want to hear. Maybe you’re anxious to tell the world what you think, but you’re afraid of the consequences. Whatever the reason you’re keeping your opinions quiet, it’s not good enough to silence you. You’re the master of your mind, body and soul. You’re the decision-maker. Your opinions matter, and you have the right to express them. All you need to do is follow two simple steps to regain the self-worth you need to honor your voice.

Step #1: Accept Why You’re Silent.

We all reach a point in our lives when that not-so-nice voice (inner critic, gremlin, etc.) inside of us says that we’re not good enough -- but that voice is not your true voice. So when the voice says the scale or your boyfriend dictate who you are, know that voice lies. You’re worth just as much as – if not, more than – that not-so-nice voice. You’re worthy of praise, love and respect. So the next time you hear that your feelings, opinions, or thoughts don’t matter, know that that just isn't your true voice speaking. Rid yourself of doubt and loathing and replace those feelings with conviction and esteem. Now you can become a better you -- a vocal you.

Step #2: Make Yourself Heard.

Right now is a great time to make a pinky promise: “I can learn to love, accept, and respect my body starting with one pinky." When your promise seems impossible to keep, remember to value function over form. You may not be able to love your pinky, for what it looks like, however you can begin to appreciate it for what it does. For example, if you didn't have your pinky, you wouldn't be able to write so easily and you would feel off balance. Your pinky is valuable. Once you appreciate one pinky, let that pinky turn into two, into hands, into limbs, until you first appreciate and then love your entire body. Allot yourself praise everyday: you’re beautiful, you’re worthy, you’re smart. When one mind is changed, the world is changed. Start believing in yourself, and others will believe in you, too. Use that newfound confidence to be outspoken. Be your guru. Make your decisions. Honor your voice.

My Story

So why am I oh-so familiar with these steps, and with the need to own my true voice and honor my choices? I lived the first 30 years of my life dreading change and wanting it at the same time. It felt like a push-pull. I desired change and yet avoided it like the plague. It wasn’t until I realized why I was unhappy that I could start figuring out how to be happy. After I recognized my abusive relationship with food, how it did not consume me but how I consumed it, I was able to change my eating habits for the better. I am now able to make the healthy and happy choices, choices that let me feel good about myself. Now that I’m honoring my voice, I can honor my body - one pinky at a time.

Remember every pinky step is leading you to a stronger voice.

So what about you? In a world full of voices, how do you find and honor your own? Do you catch yourself making decisions based on pleasing others, before you ask yourself what you really want and need? How do you ground yourself when making tough choices? How do you honor your voice?