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Owning Pleasure: Preparing to Attend Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts

Monday, March 15th, 2010

Hiya Pinkies!

This weekend I am heading to New York City for the first weekend of the Mastery Program at Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts. You Pinkies may remember Mama Gena from the interview I did with her a few months ago for my book, What’s Up Down There? Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend (St. Martin’s Press, October 2010). This is a Pinkie who has redefined (or, more accurately, unearthed) the truth of what it is to be a woman, and to Own Pleasure.

What I’m In For*

According to Mama Gena (and the Pinkies and Sister Goddesses to whom I’ve spoken who have taken the course), this weekend is going to be about “unleashing the intoxicating experience of being exquisitely you within a community of strong, hot, fun, confident women.” Whoa, Nelly! Something tells me my life is about to be taken to a whole new level of Pinkness. Some of what I can expect to be reacquainted with this spring includes:

Confidence, confidence, confidence (yes, Pinkies, I for sure need help with this sometimes!)
Learning to expose my truths, and experience more freedom to be the woman I really am in my relationships
Reconnecting with the Divine Feminine and hooking back into my dreams & desires
Putting the “O” back in MOM (as a mom who shares a bedroom with her four-year-old, I’ll be paying extra close attention during this part of the class!)
Experiencing a greater ownership of my sensuality and sexuality
Becoming intoxicated by the beauty of my own body
Attracting what I’ve been desiring
Bringing the fire, juice and romance back into my marriage

Uh, yes… please! Who among us doesn’t desire to touch into these elements of their own lives? And Pinkies – there’s still room! Please come join me this weekend if you can.

In preparation for all of this, I thought I’d take stock of where I am, and where I’m headed. To do this, I’m going to be doing a round of what Mama Gena calls “the BGDs”: Brags, Gratitudes, and Desires (Mama Gena calls it the Holy Trinity!). I figure, what better way to get where I want to than by Owning where I am? Of course this exercise must include you Pinkies, who will be with me in spirit (or maybe in person!) throughout this course.

How to OWN the BGDs

1. First, list your brags. This is anything about your life and yourself that you feel is particularly wonderful. Anything you’re proud of. This can be an awkward practice for many of us (especially women), who have been taught not to make ourselves too big or draw too much attention to ourselves (ugh, when did this happen? And why?). The Sister Goddesses (Mama Gena’s online community) actually keep a “brag board,” where one Sister Goddess lists a brag and the others “upride” you – telling you how great you really are, instantly dissolving any shame a sister might feel in speaking about herself this way. Why not start this practice in your own Pink Posse?

2. Now, list your gratitudes. What about yourself and your life are you most grateful? Dig deep. Be thankful!

3. Finally, think about all that you desire. Having made lists of what makes you strong and what makes you grateful is a wonderful primer to start thinking about all that is possible. Don’t edit based on limited beliefs or the fact that you can’t see “how” something might happen. When you are living in your power, anything is possible. Live big, Pinkies! Go nuts. As Pink Goddess Tama Kieves says, “Figure out what will make you giggle to your toes.”

I could brag all day about how blessed I am these days. But doing so doesn’t tend to make one popular in the world, from what I’ve discovered. Why is that? Why are we so willing to rally around our girlfriends when we life turns shitty and so reluctant to be there when life is grand? Mama Gena would want us to say “Fuck that!” (“Scuse my French, but seriously, what’s the deal with us?)

So letting go of all barriers, here goes. My BGD’s.

Owning MY BGD’s: (Eeh Gad!)

BRAGS:

1. I have this amazing Ivy League MBA hubby who desires nothing more than to be a stay home dad, rub my back, and help my businesses thrive.

2. My dreams are all coming true this year. It freaks the hell out of me because coming face to face with your calling is terrifying. But it’s everything I’ve asked for, so I can only bow to the Universe for making it all happen.

3. I am opening the Owning Pink Center next month, which will allow me to redefine health as I know it. Forget what they taught me in med school. There’s SO MUCH more than being simply well. We can be vital. It’s within our reach. I can’t wait to share it

4. It appears I am a gifted writer and artist (I wrote two books that are being published this year, and prepared an art show that’s being prepared to tour the country as we speak. Woo hoo! Go me!) Damn- that was hard to write.

5. I am, by nature, a healer (ooh- even harder! What a loaded word!) My most essential gift is to see the vitality in another person and help bring it forth, not only by practicing medicine, but by seeing and holding space for another to heal him or herself (we all have this power!)

GRATITUDES:

1. I am SO grateful for the amazing team that volunteers their efforts to making Owning Pink come to life. Where did these people come from? How can I thank them? I will feel forever blessed.

2. I feel gratitude that I am actually flying to NYC this week to meet all you amazing Sister Goddesses! It still feels a bit surreal. I can’t WAIT!

3. I am so grateful that I have been able to release my fear and follow my heart. It hasn’t been easy but it has absolutely served me every step of the way. Thank you Universe!

4. I am in awe of All of you extraordinary Pinkies

5. What would I do without my husband and daughter? They keep me grounded.

6. I am so grateful for the breathtaking landscape surrounding my home, and my ability to walk out into it on a regular basis.

7. I feel immense gratitude for an upbringing so loving and unconditional that it gave me the ability to give and receive love effortlessly.

8. I am so grateful for my whole family. I am truly blessed.

DESIRES:

1. I desire better sex. There. I said it! My sweet hubby longs for it too, I’m sure. But we have this quiet agreement not to speak of such things. What’s with that? BRING IT!

2. I desire more luxuries in life. I don’t consider myself particularly materialistic, but after quitting my lucrative job and making the leap of faith to live life on my terms, I’ve had to make some sacrifices. I’m done with that! I long for spa days again!

3. I desire balance. Pure and simple. A life of balance. Is that so much to ask?

4. I desire for What’s Up Down There to be on the New York Times Bestseller list. (Hey! A girl can dream!)

5. I desire to have the magic of Owning Pink become a national – and worldwide – phenomenon, allowing millions to recognize their own magnificence and begin to live from that place.

6. I desire to spend more of my time doing what makes me feel most alive: writing, making art, seeing patients, being with my family, dancing, hiking, and BEING REAL!

I’m ready!

Whew! How are you feeling now, Pinkies? What did this exercise bring up for you? What new part of yourself do you feel ready to Own? What does taking it to the next level look like to you? How do you Own Pleasure in your every day life?

I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling energized, hopeful, and pretty damn excited about this weekend. Please join me, Pinkies – there’s still room! You can find out more and register at Mama Gena’s website: www.mamagenas.com.

What are your BGD’s? What if we make this a daily practice? Start practicing here in the comments or join the Brags, Gratitudes, Desires Group on the Pink Posse to share what you wish to OWN.

Owning what I got – and ready to take it higher,

Lissa

*list adapted from www.mamagenas.com

Tags: confidence, desires, femininity, gratitude, mama gena, pleasure, sensuality, sexuality, women
Posted in Finding Mojo, Lissa's personal yada yada yada, Owning Sexuality, Owning You, Owning Your Body, Personal Empowerment | 10 Comments »

Mojo Monday Exercise: Connect Body and Mind Through Sign Dancing

Monday, March 15th, 2010

We’ve all heard about the mind/body connection, that thinking a certain way can affect your body. You can visualize your cancer cells getting eaten up, and it works! But did you know it also works the other way around? That you can move your body in a way that affects your mind? Yoga is a great example of this, but there are other movements that can help heal your mind. Today, we’re going to try Sign Dancing.

How I Discovered Sign Dancing

I learned this Sign Dance from Rachel Naomi Remen, MD, author of Kitchen Table Wisdom and a woman I deeply admire. In my opinion, Rachel is a living saint. She works at Commonweal in Bolinas, CA, running retreats for people with cancer and founding The Healer’s Art, a curriculum now taught in most medical schools that teaches medical schools to connect, with their patients and themselves. She’s also single-handedly trying to heal the wounded physicians that make up our broken health care system. Amazing woman- really. Uber Pink Goddess status.

Rachel says she uses this Sign Dance whenever she needs to open her heart. You can try this simple exercise whenever you’re feeling closed off after a challenging work experience or after a fight with a family member. When you’ve just received bad news or when are just having a really mojo-less day. Try it! You might be surprised by the power of this dance. Rachel says she does it in public restrooms when she needs to, but she recommends against doing it in public. People might look at you funny, if you do, but come on! Who cares? This dance is based on American Sign Language, so theoretically, if you do it in public and someone knows sign language, they can you’re your dance. Come on, let’s sign dance!

Step 1: Find a place you can move around and state your intention for the sign dance. Maybe it’s “I’m going to open my heart.” Or maybe it’s “I’d like to forgive my boss.” Whatever it is- say it.

Step 2: Clasp your hands over her heart and say, “Love.”

Step 3: Sweep your arms out front in a semi-circle and touch your shoulders with your index fingers, and say, “Yourself.”

Step 4: Bring your crossed hands to your heart again, and say “Love” again.

Step 5: Throw your arms up in the air, flinging your arms to the side and looking to the sky, saying “All!”

Step 6: Moving your left hand into the shape of an “L,” hold the L above your heart, and then fling your arm out as if scattering seeds and say, “Let Go.”

Step 7: Sweep both outstretched arms from left to right, saying, “Move on.”

Step 8: Make a C with your left hand and hold it parallel to the ground. Then lift your right hand through your left hand, as if it is a sprout growing out of a flower pot. When your right hand reaches the top, extends your fingers all the way out like a beautiful blossom and say, “And Grow.”

Step 9: Moving your left hand around your face in a semi-circle to the right, say, “In Beauty.”

Step 10: Sweep your hand straight across your face and say, “And Wisdom.”

Step 11: Bending all the way over into a yoga forward bend, hold your thumbs together with your fingers outstretched and lift your hands all the way from the ground up to shoulder height and say, “Feel.”

Step 12: Flexing your biceps like Popeye, say “Strong,” shaking your fists to reinforce it.

Step 13: Step your right foot to the side and put your hands on your shoulders before saying, “Stand.” Then fling your arms all the way out and look up to the heavens, saying “Tall.”

Step 14: Altogether, it goes like this. “Love yourself. Love all. Let go and move on, in beauty and wisdom. Feel strong. Stand tall.” Do it ten times, until you’ve got it down. Now Sign Dance like you mean it!

How do you feel, Pinkies? I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling all open-hearted. If nothing else, you probably laughed and feel a little goofy, and you gotta love that!

How was that for you? Can you think of some occasions when that might come in handy? Post your comments and let’s chat about it. And keep Sign Dancing!

Letting go and moving on,

Lissa

Tags: beauty, dancing, expression, feeling, goddess, Love, Owning Surrender, Rachel Naomi Remen, strength, wisdom
Posted in Finding Mojo, Owning Creativity, Owning Joy, Owning Surrender, Owning Your Body | No Comments »

Claiming Our Divine Selves: Why We Don’t Need to Wait

Sunday, March 7th, 2010

Dear Pinkies, please welcome back Audrey Vitolins, a motivational speaker, consultant and intuitive coach for transformation, who helps her clients uncover their truth – or what she calls their gold. She’s a Magical Eyes coach, Pinkies! And she’s here today to talk a bit about why we wait to follow our dreams … and why we don’t need to any more.

*****

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”
– Anais Nin

Can you feel the excitement?! The buzz of energies, a sense that what you have been waiting for is indeed possible?! Or perhaps you are feeling an uncertainty as you face a blank canvas knowing that it is indeed your time to fill it. Are you feeling that you almost cannot deny the call to respond? As written above, that it’s almost becoming too painful to wait any longer? Or maybe you are feeling dead in the water knowing that the old way no longer fits.

I’ve walked this path and know what it’s like to make the conscious decision to unfold and how challenging it can be. I’ve streamlined what I’ve learned so that others have an easier time, and this is why I now guide beautiful, amazing, passionate souls through this process.

Divine Timing

It is key that during these times you understand the difference between the patience involved in allowing something to manifest, aka “divine timing”, versus waiting to step into what you sense is possible or into the embodiment of your Divine Loving Self.

Waiting to be who you are here to be is not the same as being patient. One is victim consciousness and a lack of action, the other is acknowledging that all is in divine order. Hear this again – hoping that your feeling doubtful or fearful of living authentically will one day dissolve is not patience. It’s just waiting.

You experience how it can be challenging to pick up senses about things to come such as the endings of relationships, beginnings, possibilities, moves, creative ideas, etc. You have this sense but are not sure as to the timing. So you wait and delay stepping into the power of the now opportunity.

Ways we wait

We do this on several levels. On an external level, we wait to move forward on practical matters because we know that change is coming. Perhaps you ignore a job opportunity or new relationship because you sense an upcoming change and don’t understand how these new opportunities will fit into the change you sense.

This also occurs at an internal level. You wait to be less afraid, to be more loving, to speak up, to treat your body with respect until you arrive at your new destination whether this new destination is energetic (e.g. you release blame or guilt) or physical (e.g. you move to Georgia). Or you continue to act defensive and closed down with people around you who cause you stress because you know that one day you will get a new job, new spouse, move away from your family or those neighbors or that group of friends and all will be well in this new land.

In other words, you are waiting for something outside of yourself to make it easier for you to be you. When really, you sense that right now you would rather laugh more, act softer, more nurturing, take a risk, let go of old regrets. And instead of just being or doing those things, you wait until others change, until you feel validated and safe. All the while not owning that the place of safety and validation is completely within yourself.

What happens is that you wait for your future to begin. You wait to arrive in Oz and then you will have courage and then you will know how to live from your heart space and then you will be at home and then you will be able to think clearly and paint like the wild artist you always knew you were. And what happens is that it takes much longer to arrive in OZ than you ever thought. And you begin to realize that you are exhausted, irritable, uninspired and you believe this is due to not being in OZ. Rather . . . it’s because you have decided to wait to be who you are divinely coded to be.

What are you waiting for?

Who or what are you waiting to be? Why are you waiting and what are you waiting for? Stop waiting and click those red heels. You do not need to “get” a new life to experience a healthy body, to be calmer, to be more loving, to step into your passion, to master your energy. You do these things, embody these things and thus create a new life.

If you want to get along better with that co-worker, don’t wait for him/her to change. BE who you want to be with them. If they reject you, you will not die! And if you are afraid you will shrivel up, then that is your indicator that you are waiting for something outside of you to change. Claim the freedom and expansion you will experience as you live from your truth and your integrity in that moment. Do this over and over and perhaps that person will change and perhaps not. But YOU WILL.

This planet needs as many of us to be in our power, to claim our Divine Heart Based Self. Please be the inspiration in someone’s life today and use your magical eyes to see other beautiful souls who are wanting to blossom!

Seeing you in your Joy ~

Audrey

Tags: connection, divine order, divine self, divine timing, magical eyes, patience, power, waiting
Posted in Finding Mojo, Guest Pinkies, Owning You, Owning Your Intuition, Personal Empowerment | No Comments »

Breaking Through Expectactions: You Really Are Enough

Sunday, February 28th, 2010

Dear Pinkies, please welcome back to the mainstage Brother Michael Mackintosh, here with more wisdom about how we can touch into our most authentic selves – and untying ourselves from all that doubt that we’re not enough, just as we are. Ahhh, don’t you feel freer already? Deep bows of gratitude, Brother Michael. Enjoy, Pinksters!

*****

Aloha, wonderful Pinkies …

Have you ever had the thought, “I am not good enough” or something similar?

Our natural state of wonder is submerged beneath countless layers of programming, so it’s not surprising how many people constantly feel that they are unworthy and not good enough in some area of their life. If there is one illness of our time, it is this: believing we are not ‘good enough’, ‘beautiful enough’ or ‘worthy enough’.

What is enough?

What is ‘enough’? Who wrote the rulebook? And where did these ideas of being worthy or unworthy come from? Did you decide what was enough on your own?

Not likely. Most of these notions of what is ‘enough’ come from the impossible standards of beauty and success that have been set by the media and our social conditioning since birth. If you don’t live up to them, you are apparently ‘not enough’ – no matter what.

Many of us often don’t realize the power of these influences. In fact, studies on this subject show that most people deny the effects of the media upon their choices – but act in alignment with their influence.

To not know we don’t know is very dangerous. To not know we don’t know – and think we d0 – is a guaranteed way to stay stuck for a long time and not live YOUR life the way YOU choose.

Unreasonable expectations and social pressures tend to create a sense of chronic low self-esteem and lack of self-love (even if it’s just a slight niggling feeling) that is so constant it is only noticed when the shift is made and that feeling dissolves, leaving a sense of profound inner peace and contentment that is unparalleled by any other experience.

When under the pressure of ‘I am not enough, I need to fit in’, we often cover up these painful feelings in various ways: buying products, being distracted by the insentient and constant entertainment industry, doing this, doing that, doing the other. We have so many millions of potential distractions to choose from these days. However, they never last – and the sense of un-ease and discontentment deep in the soul remains.

A new perspective

Here’s a thought: NO ONE CAN LIVE UP TO THESE IDEAS ANYWAY! And we don’t even need to try!

Let me say that again: NO ONE CAN LIVE UP TO THESE IDEAS ANYWAY! And we don’t even need to try!

You are totally wonderful and lovable just as you are. We are all good enough, worthy and lovable NOW!

Being your own guru

My mission is to provide guidance and love for anyone who wants to tap into their own higher self, their own real reason and purpose in life, and to have the Best Day Ever. Here in Hawaii, I used to live in the house of David Wolfe, live food public speaker, where the term ‘Have The Best Day Ever’ was something that echoed around the house on a regular basis.

However, how does your Best Day Ever look, sound and feel? What is your best life ever? What does ‘best ever’ even mean for you personally? From my years of experience teaching and serving others to live their highest destiny, my feeling is that each one of us has our own unique potential, specialties, gifts and creative expressions to share with the world.

No two beings are the same. As I write this now I just noticed a beautiful bright red bird sitting a few feet away on a tree. Life would not be beautiful if it were not for the variety that we experience around us.

There are many ways to get in touch with our higher self, our spiritual essence, our meaning, and dharmic, purposeful living. I do my best to share the most simple, powerful methods that I am aware of to empower others to live their highest potential because I know that ultimately – you know the answers to all questions.

In fact, if you can ask the question – you know the answer.

Many people are looking for gurus and teachers to tell them what to do. However, ultimately each of us is our own teacher, and guru. A guru means guide. I feel the responsibility of teachers is to lead by example and to point us back towards ourselves and give the encouragement and empowerment to others to say, ‘yes, I do have it in me to take my own life to the next level. I do have the power to grow and express my unique gifts.’

My aim for being here with you wonderful Pinkies is to inspire you to answer your own questions so your box of joy can be opened wide.

I look forward to sharing more with you soon. Love to all you beautiful, wonderful pinkies who are ALL perfect just as you are!

Much love from Hawaii,

Your brother Michael

Tags: beauty, expectations, self love, self-acceptance, spirit
Posted in Finding Mojo, Owning Surrender, Owning You, Owning Your Intuition, Personal Empowerment | 1 Comment »