I just met two deadlines for two books in one week. The manuscript for What’s Up Down There? Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend was due December 1, and the edits on the galleys for my other book Encaustic Art: The Complete Guide To Creating Fine Art With Wax was due December 3. And I did it, Pinkies! I almost ignored my family over Thanksgiving in order to meet my deadline, but that didn’t seem Pink at all, so I put it off and then worked my tail off to catch up. But I did it!
That night, I went out with my girls to celebrate me and my accomplishments! We ate sushi, watched the full moon from the hot tub, and celebrated. Not only did I meet my deadline, but Dr. Christiane Northrup agreed to write the foreword for my gynecology book. WOO HOO! (A dream come true for me, Pinkies!) I am still reeling- and feeling the relief spread all through my body.
How often do you celebrate YOU? Think back though all of your accomplishments. How often have you taken the time to honor yourself and celebrate your success with those you love? Why is it that we readily share our worries, troubles, and woes while we squirrel away our successes as though they’re reasons to feel ashamed? What if we brought accomplishments out the closet and let the light of glory shine down upon them? What if we could honor them here, rather than hiding them?
I’ve often felt shy about my successes. While you’re sure to get girlfriend support when you’re in the midst of a divorce, who do you tell when four publishers are fighting over your book? Success may trigger people’s own insecurities. It’s not that they’re not happy for you, but your success may shine the light on what they consider their failures. Instead of jumping for joy, you may find that others try to diminish you. They simply can’t handle the light you radiate.
I used to feel hurt by this. Why should I dim my own light just to be accepted? Not that I want to be arrogant, but why can’t I celebrate my successes as vibrantly as I share my frustrations, fears, and failures? I’ve learned to keep quiet, to tone down my dial, and to make an effort to make others feel better.
But why? Why do we do this to each other? Why can’t we be expansive enough to feel another Pinkie’s joy without taking it personally? If you have good news, I want to hear it, Pinkies! I want you to write about how you’ve fallen in love, how you’ve found your dream job, how you’ve been selected for the top notch art show, how you found a literary agent, how your kid just wrote you a love letter, or how your boss just wrote a glowing review about you. Why are we so hesitant to share the good? I promise, I won’t see it as self-promoting or arrogant. I will see it as a well-deserved revelry for the value that lies within you.
I am trying to keep this in mind as I face certain successes lately. I’m tempted to hide my good news, for fear that it will make you resent me (this is my wound in life, so I’m sensitive about it). But Owning Pink is all about telling the truth, being authentic, and spreading love throughout our community and sharing what’s real- the bad AND the good. Let’s set an example. Let’s make it okay to tell the truth, whatever the truth holds.
Let’s shake up the Pink Posse forum and invite all of us to not just share our trials, but to celebrate our triumphs. Let’s light fireworks and do a little dance when any one of us has a breakthrough.
But first, it all comes back to YOU. Do you honor yourself when good things happen? Do you throw your arms in the air and spin in circles while whooping it up with glee? Do you believe that your good news is OUR good news? I do…
Believing and dying to dance in your light,
Lissa
