This post is for anyone who ever told themselves that their problems weren’t a big deal because someone, somewhere, has it worse.

You know what I’m talking about, right?  The kind of thinking where, despite the fact that you’re going through (or went through) real challenges, you dismiss them because you feel guilty for “complaining” about something so trivial.

I sometimes find it challenging to honor my own feelings – especially if what I want or feel seems to be at odds with other people, or my emotions don’t seem to be “appropriate” to the situation.  While I’m not someone who tends to hold back sharing my honest opinions, desires, and feelings and, over the years, I’ve gotten quite a bit of feedback from people close to me about talking too much, dominating situations or conversations, and being selfish – underneath all of this is a deep fear that my feelings and desires aren’t as important as other people’s.

I moved home to Maine last week after pining for the home that it’s represented for me my whole life. When you cross the Maine state line you’re greeted by a sign that says: “Maine: The Way Life Should Be.” As far as state mottos go, this one really floats my boat.

I just wrapped up living no place in particular for the past 15 months on. My man and I did more than 30,000 miles by car last year, I logged many more in the air, and we slept in over 100 beds.

I recently had the opportunity to be alone. By myself. No family. Just me and the house. Wow. What a treat. And then I went to a bar. Ok, I didn't actually go to a bar, I went to a restaurant when it was crowded and they stuck me in the bar for a few minutes until a table opened. But in that time I met a guy who seemed a little tipsy. Under other circumstances I would have thought he was attractive. We'll call him On-the-make Bob, and even though he didn't make a formal pass at me, I felt uneasy with the way he looked at me. I became conscious that I was wearing a low cut top and suddenly felt a little naked. I flashed my wedding ring but he didn't shut up. Other people were at the bar. One woman even seemed to realize Bob was a little creepy and asked about my husband. I was totally safe. Before long I got my table and got away from the guy. He had done and said nothing wrong, but I felt vulnerable for some reason.