Owning Pink Bloggers

Pain can turn coal into diamonds. Look for the gems in life’s experiences.

Owning Relationships

Lissa Rankin's picture

For All the New Moms Who Feel Clueless

Lately, I've been talking to a lot of new mothers who feel so much pressure to have it all together and don't feel safe expressing how overwhelming it can be to have a child. If you have a new baby, and you’re feeling like you have no clue how to be a mother, you’re SO not alone. When my daughter Siena was born, I felt so unraveled by her, as if she could see right through me to all my insecurities. I wrote this in my journal when she was just a wee one, so if you or someone you love has a new baby, this post is for you...

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Lissa Rankin's picture

Memorial Day Memories

Memorial Day

For most of us, Memorial Day weekend means picnics, water sports, booze, friends and family, music, and an excuse to let loose before getting back to the grind on Tuesday. But for people like Julia, it’s a day of observance, of honoring those we have lost in war, of tears.

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How to Get Him to Take Out the Garbage (or, In Praise of Being Nice)

Slow Sex

At a time when many women feel pressured to add sex to their Superwoman to-do list without feeling like they get much in return, Slow Sex by Nicole Daedone is a much needed and welcome invitation for women and men to strip down to the bare essentials of a woman's authentic sexuality so sex can fill her up, rather than deplete her. A must-read for any woman who hasn't fully accessed her orgasmic potential and yearns to more fully embody the intimacy and surrender a loving sexual relationship can bring to a woman's wholly healthy life." -- Lissa Rankin

How to Get Him to Take Out the Garbage (or, In Praise of Being Nice)

I teach female orgasm. More specifically, I teach a practice called OM or Orgasmic Meditation, which turns our idea about what sex is (and isn’t) on its head. It’s a practice where a woman lies down and her fully clothed partner—often but not necessarily a man—strokes her clitoris for fifteen minutes in a very specific way. Simple? Absolutely. Complicated? Whoa, baby. When I first introduce the practice at workshops, notepads start falling on the floor, necks get flushed, and I can barely find anyone who will make eye contact with me in the room.  

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Lissa Rankin's picture

When Mean Girls Lash Out

mean girls

Leading up to Mother’s Day, I thought about writing a post about the many blessings in my life, including my gorgeous 5-year-old daughter and my adoring, sexy hubby. After all, if you watch the Hallmark commercials, you’d believe that Mother’s Day is a day to celebrate, right?

But I did what I often do and decided to sit in meditation and let the Universe tell me what message would best serve the highest good of the Owning Pink community. And the day before Mother’s Day, I was led to write this tribute to childless Mommies, to honor all the women without children who give birth and mother in other ways. Then, on Mother’s Day, I wrote a love letter to every person for whom Mother’s Day is no cakewalk, particularly those whose mothers didn’t live up to the Hallmark fairytale.

And then on the day itself, I went up to Sonoma County to celebrate the day with my family. And when I got back to my computer that night, I was shocked to see that, in addition to many tender, touching, and heartfelt comments, one or more mean girls snuck in and decided to kick me in the gut.

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Lissa Rankin's picture

When Mother’s Day Is No Cakewalk

Mother's Day

Mother’s Day is today, which is a day to celebrate, right? We take Mommies out to brunch and give them flowers. Kids hand-craft macaroni necklaces to adorn Mommy in her Sunday dress. We kiss, hug, send cards, and jam up the phone lines as we remember our own mothers. In a perfect world, Mother’s Day would be a day we could all celebrate.

But, as some of you may know, we don’t live in a perfect world. For some, Mother’s Day is a day people want to dig a hole and crawl in. It’s a day they wish they could fast forward through. It’s a day that makes them cringe as they watch all the happy people bustle about wearing white orchids and smiling with happy children carrying balloons.

I’m Blessed
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Lissa Rankin's picture

Identifying & Warding Off Emotional Vampires: Part 2 of Emotional Freedom

emotional freedom

If you read part one of the Emotional Freedom series about combating emotional vampires, you got a sense for how to know when someone is sucking you dry. In part two, we’ll tackle how to hone your X-ray vision so you can spot an emotional vampire from miles away, so you can protect yourself from getting depleted from those who long to suck your life force right out of you.

But first, a bit about Dr. Judith Orloff’s classification of emotional vampires (all of this info comes from Dr. Orloff's rockin' book, Emotional Freedom: Liberate Yourself From Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life -- thanks, love!).

Types of Emotional Vampires
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Lissa Rankin's picture

15 Ways To Leave Your Lover (With Love)

ways to leave your lover

I just reread Elizabeth Gilbert’s memoir Eat, Pray, Love, and I found myself tearing up when I read, “The only thing more unthinkable than leaving was staying; the only thing more impossible than staying was leaving."

You see, I remember that feeling. I’ll never forget that feeling.

I Am Divorced
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Lissa Rankin's picture

How To Talk To Your Tween Girl - And Be Heard

talk to your tween girl

(If you hear music with this post, scroll down and pause the video until you're ready to watch!)

When I think back to being 13, which my mother calls my “door slamming year,” I shake a bit in my pink patent leather go-go boots because I know one day my 5-year-old will be a tween, and paybacks can be sweet, eh?

This past year, I spent five months traveling the country, answering the anonymous questions of teen girls at universities on my book tour for What’s Up Down There? Questions You’d Only Ask Your Gynecologist If She Was Your Best Friend. Afterwards, dozens of them came up to say they wished they could have talked to their mothers about body stuff the way they felt they could talk to me. (Aw, shucks.)

As a mother myself, it reminds me of the importance of making our daughters feel safe to talk to us about anything. If she can’t come to us, who will she go to? Her best friend? An internet chat room? Sheesh!

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